I’ve touched on loss before, and really any painful event that triggers a period of transition. It’s an inevitability of life, something we’ll all have to experience.
However, there’s a particularly dangerous aspect of life that really tests even the strongest will, and that’s loneliness.
It’s a hell of many dimensions. It’s crushingly heavy but makes you feel like you’re adrift in a void. It can make you want nothing to do with people but crave any interaction you can get. Depending on your situation, it can make you forget everything positive that you have in your life in an instant. That can be a real testament to how the worth of many things in life are viewed through the lens of having people to share in them with. This isn’t to say you can’t achieve only for yourself, but pure isolation isn’t possible nor healthy. It’s a killer. There’s a reason why solitary confinement is the utmost punishment in prison. This only strengthens the discussions about collective actions that I’ve touched on in the past, and how at our core we’re the same. It’s only location, experience, and information input that contextualizes us.
Speaking of that health aspect, it significantly increases risk for multiple serious conditions. There’s scientific evidence, and anecdotal evidence in my own life concerning my grandmother and how rapidly her dementia progressed. Anyone that’s seen the complete picture of this condition beginning to end knows how terrible it is. That’s the risk with loneliness. It’s something that is directly in opposition to human nature and will erode you. I’m experiencing a little bit of erosion myself, hence this discussion. It helps to get it out there.
There’s plenty of “Top 5" lists out there that will discuss what to do about loneliness, I’m trying not to generate that sort of content as there’s enough people who do that already. As with most things, time helps. But more than time, it will take healthy activities and methods to overcome loneliness. I’m trying them myself and will continue to because it’s a prolonged battle.
Note the “healthy" part. Do not give in to the temptation of filling the hole with things that will only help erode the foundation later. Sounds obvious, but it’s easy in a world that’s gotten very used to instant gratification and pain removal.
Focus on yourself and anything that you know will make you crack a smile. Get out of your own way and your own head and allow yourself to enjoy. Throw yourself into something you feel is worth doing. Who knows who you’ll meet along the way?
People are generally stronger than what they think, and this is something that will only serve to make them stronger in the long run. If this is particularly relevant right now for you as it is for me, I’ll tell you what I’m telling myself: you’ve gotten through everything in your life up until this point, what is this but just another step in the transformation?
Keep on going,